Post by Cascadia on May 30, 2006 16:57:25 GMT -5
Chapter One - Friendship
I watched him cross my front yard, one hand swinging carelessly by his side, the other gripping a bottle of soda. I can feel anger radiating from me, seeping out of my every pore into the air, heating it and pulsing around my body. He doesn't seem to notice though, he never notices anymore. He stops by me; sipping his soda and grinning with the goofy oblivious look that makes me want to smack him. Instead I grit my teeth and scowl. He doesn't realize the glare is for him. I guess I wear the expression so often in his presence he's grown accustomed to it.
"Hey." His voice makes my insides clench and it feels like my ears could start bleeding.
"Hello." he word freezes on the air, suspended in time he tone and repressed emotions behind it sting as it rolls off my tongue. I clench my jaw, wondering if he'll finally hear me for once, realize that I'm upset. His brow wrinkles, eyebrows pulled together as if in confusion. For a moment, I think he may have noticed my existence, cared for how I felt, wanted to talk about more then –
“You seen Cassy?" Of course, I think bitterly, it's always about her. The tinge of hope that in my eyes blinked out, the empty glare returning.
“No.” Amazing. Ten minutes we’d been standing here and he’d drawn two words from me. I suddenly got the picture of sending my fist into his mouth, feeling the satisfying crunch as my knuckles shifted beneath the skin, tearing open as they met his teeth. Smirking, I held the image a moment, feeling it, letting it flow over my mind. Like silk, tantalizingly soft. My fingers curled in response, my grip tightening in anticipation. But the release would never come, the rage would be controlled. Held down, like a beast in a cage. Eventually it might get free, it would always be there, you can’t just forget a part of yourself.
“I think she’s avoiding me.” His voice was light, weak. A wisp of a sound that could be carried off on the nonresistant wind. I smirked at him. Just imagine the look on his face when he finds out. Cassy had been cheating on him. Or had cheated. Didn’t matter how many times. Just that she had, and he still didn’t know. And I’m not going to tell him. Not yet at least. I compose my face, managing a sympathetic look.
“When’s the last time you talked to her?” Then I lost myself in my thoughts, not caring what he said. Didn’t matter to me. I flipped my cell out, checking the time. Cassy was going to meet me here, and he’d have to leave. Then I could rub it in his face later. Or, have him over while she was still here. Possibilities ran through my mind as he stood talking. Finally his mouth stopped moving and I nodded, offering a soft grunt.
“Well, I gotta go man. See you.” He speaks a reply. The sound hitting my ears but my mind not bothering to comprehend it. I walk into my house, watching him walk away and laugh inside. I waste a few minutes doing absolutely nothing, until I hear a soft knock at the door. I get up, running a hand back through my hair. It’s too long to keep neat. Shrugging, I figure she won’t care anyway. She loves playing with it no matter how I style it. I pull open the door, and see her standing there, normal as this could seem. She’s dressed just as I see her at school, a black short skirt and tight tank top. My eyes skim her once, then meet her eyes, but I force them back down her, lingering daringly. I know she’s watching me look her over. She smiles, walking in without a welcome and pushes the door shut, ignoring my hand still on the knob. Then she comes to me, her arms on my back, one hand buried in my hair, her fingertips grazing over my neck. My hands find her hips, pulling her against me tightly. She presses up on me, her cheek brushing against mine. I breath a bit quicker, I always do when she hugs me like this. I can’t help it. Damn the female race. They always seem to know exactly where to touch, how to fit their body against yours, make your blood run hot…
“So how are you?” Her voice floats to me, whispered in my ear, her lips flickering over my skin. It’s almost as soft as her touch. Almost. Behind the innocent question and hug lay a rougher tone, a hard meaning, bare and brutal. You either accept it or reject it, but there’s no ignoring it. Some do, but they’re left blushing and stupid stuttering at the grace she carried herself with, and still possesses as she walks away. Then you’re left there, wondering if she even said anything at all, the hint left so obvious in the air that you can’t help but question if you imagined the whole thing. I groan involuntarily as she rubs against me, almost catlike and pulls back. I find my voice, my tongue ignoring my order at first, then spoke to her.
“Pretty good.” Our ritual is nearly over, and we both know what comes next. She pulls out her phone, pressing a few keys when I catch her hands. She raises an eyebrow, eyes shining and I almost loose my nerve. But I see his name, the screen of her phone lit up around the letters, her nail polish glittering as her finger sweeps over the ‘call’ button. I take the cell, hitting it off and lay it down on the table. She stands expectantly, knowing what I want, and also for me to move first. I take a few steps forward, testing how close I can get before I loose myself in her eyes. I push her backward, slowly, deliberately. She has a hunger in her eyes I’ve only seen one or two other times, and now it’s focused on me, and I almost understand why he is the way he is now, completely submissive to her, while her fingers run over my chest, tugging at my shirt. She sits on the couch, spreading her legs, her hands on my shoulders while I lay over her. Her knees sweep up my sides, smooth, my shirt already discarded to the floor. It’s like the whole world is falling with me, gravity tugging at me softly, or maybe it’s her, her hands still on my now bare shoulders. Time rights itself as I think this, and our mouths are suddenly together, hers open and willing. My tongue finds hers and sweeps across it, I’ve never kissed anyone before, but I know what to do instantly, feeling a familiar ache in me as her hands move down my sides. My hand is under her head, fingers buried in her hair. The other sliding up her shirt.
Her hips move into me, rubbing against me, and I groan, never having felt this before. I pull back from her lips, taking a breath and freeze as she moans my name. Something in me breaks, guilt and pleasure and anger and lust and running together in my blood that’s pumping steadily downward. I feel my tip push out of my pants, and I know I’m too horny to control myself anymore, and it’s clogged my mind so bad I don’t even care, I slide my hand down from under her shirt to her leg, moving up her skirt. She takes a quick breath as my fingers slide over her thong, and I feel like screaming and ripping her clothes off, pounding her senseless when I feel the wetness soaking through the cloth.
But I still have some control left, and she sees that. I can see her looking into me; feel her promise on the air. She wants to drive me crazy, and that scares me a little, but not as much as it makes me want her. I move her underwear out of the way, and put my fingers on her, feeling the pulse. Swallowing to ease the tightness of my throat, I freeze, I have no idea what I’m doing and hear the voice in the back of my mind screaming Idiout! Idiout! I feel my face flush, and start to panic but her hand finds mine, guiding my finger into her. I groan and she gasps, her eyes closing briefly. Then they return to mine, daring me to go farther. Feeling her, I play with the different ways to finger her, noting each gasp and moan torn from her throat.
After a few moments, I feel her getting tighter around my finger and she stops my hand, sitting up slightly. Her fingers are pulling at my pants, and I almost smile as she fumbles with them. I’ve never seen her awkward at anything, and seeing her having trouble with my button, no, zipper now was quite amusing. I blink and see her pull down my boxers, and fear chokes me, I don’t know if I want to keep going, but then her mouth is on me and I don’t know anything at all, my thoughts a jumbled mess of lust and want, her tongue tormenting me.
I groan, my hands finding her head, fingers gripping her hair tightly. Her tongue runs over my tip lightly, and I think I’m going to scream. This is the worst pleasure I’ve ever felt, torture and ecstasy all in one, mingling and eating at my mind. I’m dazed as her teeth scrape over my shaft softly, drawing another moan from me. Then she’s gone and I’m mumbling, pleading her incoherently to please, don’t stop. She’s staring at me, a slight smile playing on her lips, as if amused by my weakness for her. Then she’s pulling me downward again, silencing me with a soft hand on my length, Holding me against her.
She traces my tip over her clit, shuddering beneath me, her grip tightening. Her hand slides around my waist, pulling me a little closer, and I feel myself slide in her, her pussy wrapping around my dick tightly. I lower myself slowly, propped up on my elbows, feeling nothing but my heartbeat quickening in time with hers.
She moaned, her hands under my arms, palms flat on my back. I pull out a little, her muscles gripping my length, and push back in, my breath coming quicker. My feet are against the armrest, giving me leverage. Her eyes are half open, glazed over in lust. She tightens around me, and this brings me back to reality a bit. I smile and pause, feeling in control. She blinks, looking amused for a moment. Then her nails rake down my back, drawing a grunt from me, my head jerking backwards at the sudden pain. Growling almost, I look back down at her, just as her hands find my hips and pull me into her roughly. I grunt, and she wraps her legs around my waist, rolling her hips, grinding against me. I push my arm under her, holding her and thrust into her harder, grunting as I shove into her deeper.
She’s whimpering beneath me, and I know I’m about to come. I hold it, wanting her to first, so I lift her shirt and bra, lowering my lips to her nipple. I lick around it, teasing her. I really don’t know how to do it right, or make it feel good for her, but by the way she’s writhing beneath me, I think I’m doing alright. It’s hard to keep my lips to her chest while I’m panting so hard, but she tastes good, like sweat and something sweet I can’t exactly place and can’t think straight enough to care right now. She cries out, her back arching, nails clawing at my back again, this time in desperation. Her breasts press against my bare chest, and holding her neck, my fingers gripping her hair, I thrust into her one last time and come, my hips still moving slightly, her tight muscles milking me.
I pull out slowly, not wanting to hurt her and collapse on her, hoping my weight isn’t hurting her, but in the position we were, I don’t think she could have cared less. My pants had lowered to my ankles, and her shirt and bra had been torn off at some point, so most of our skin was bare. I enjoyed the softness of her, her legs around my waist, my arm under her, the other stroking her arm. We lay there for a while, sweating and panting. For a while, I didn’t ever want to get up. But then her hands were on my chest, her legs back against my sides, and she was pushing me up gently.
I sat back, letting her up. She stumbled to the bathroom. I watched her ass while she walked away, feeling like a sort of god in my own way. What would people say? Knowing I lost it to her. Would they be in awe? Congratulate me? Shake their head in pity and disgust? I really didn’t care. I know I fucked her out of anger, out of revenge to my so-called friend. Bastard. But after the sex, I know why he abandoned us for her. Sighing angrily, I sit up and fix my pants, then lay back down.
She comes back out from the bathroom, picking up her bra and shirt, and she’s dressed within a minute. She’s quick. I think, and shrug the thought off. Then she’s beside me, kneeling next to the couch, staring into my eyes. She’s always been able to read minds.
“You want to call him or should I?” She asks, as if answering my thoughts.
“Do you love him?” I reply, ignoring her question. She thinks a moment, before shaking her head slowly.
“No.” Her eyes scan mine, and I know she’s looking deeper then that, so I shut my mind to her and lean my head back, guilt now filling me. Her voice interrupts my self-pity. “You already did it, there’s no going back now.”
No. There never was a ‘going back.’ Damnit. I close my eyes a moment, Why’d you force this on us? Why didn’t you just stay away from her? My spite fills me. Her eyes look slightly worried. Does she even care? Feel bad? Does she realize she destroyed our friendship?
My name rolls off her lips again, and this time it sounds like poison. Her eyes burning through the back of my skull. She’s no longer glittering, just empty. All the mystery about her, everything that captured me before was gone. Before me knelt an empty, lost confused little girl. And I felt bad for her. But not enough to betray my friends. Her eyes harden, and I know she’d been in my thoughts.
A soft, almost sadistic smile comes to her face.
“But you already have.” Her words whip me cruelly, backlash stinging as I let realization seep into me. My eyes flicker to her, but she’s already gone, leaving me stunned. I sit up, looking around the room.
“Cassy?” My voice echoes in the empty house. She was just here, I pull open the curtains, but see no one in my front yard. Letting my hand drop, I look around the room again. Just a dream? Shaking my head, I stand and walk to the bathroom, turning on the sink and splashing water over my face. Standing and drying off on a hand towel I knew what I had to do. I walked to my front door. I held the knob, taking a breath. Pulling the door open, I walked out into the brightness, and saw him sitting on his porch, sipping the soda. I swallowed my pride and called him.
“Sam.”
No going back now.
I watched him cross my front yard, one hand swinging carelessly by his side, the other gripping a bottle of soda. I can feel anger radiating from me, seeping out of my every pore into the air, heating it and pulsing around my body. He doesn't seem to notice though, he never notices anymore. He stops by me; sipping his soda and grinning with the goofy oblivious look that makes me want to smack him. Instead I grit my teeth and scowl. He doesn't realize the glare is for him. I guess I wear the expression so often in his presence he's grown accustomed to it.
"Hey." His voice makes my insides clench and it feels like my ears could start bleeding.
"Hello." he word freezes on the air, suspended in time he tone and repressed emotions behind it sting as it rolls off my tongue. I clench my jaw, wondering if he'll finally hear me for once, realize that I'm upset. His brow wrinkles, eyebrows pulled together as if in confusion. For a moment, I think he may have noticed my existence, cared for how I felt, wanted to talk about more then –
“You seen Cassy?" Of course, I think bitterly, it's always about her. The tinge of hope that in my eyes blinked out, the empty glare returning.
“No.” Amazing. Ten minutes we’d been standing here and he’d drawn two words from me. I suddenly got the picture of sending my fist into his mouth, feeling the satisfying crunch as my knuckles shifted beneath the skin, tearing open as they met his teeth. Smirking, I held the image a moment, feeling it, letting it flow over my mind. Like silk, tantalizingly soft. My fingers curled in response, my grip tightening in anticipation. But the release would never come, the rage would be controlled. Held down, like a beast in a cage. Eventually it might get free, it would always be there, you can’t just forget a part of yourself.
“I think she’s avoiding me.” His voice was light, weak. A wisp of a sound that could be carried off on the nonresistant wind. I smirked at him. Just imagine the look on his face when he finds out. Cassy had been cheating on him. Or had cheated. Didn’t matter how many times. Just that she had, and he still didn’t know. And I’m not going to tell him. Not yet at least. I compose my face, managing a sympathetic look.
“When’s the last time you talked to her?” Then I lost myself in my thoughts, not caring what he said. Didn’t matter to me. I flipped my cell out, checking the time. Cassy was going to meet me here, and he’d have to leave. Then I could rub it in his face later. Or, have him over while she was still here. Possibilities ran through my mind as he stood talking. Finally his mouth stopped moving and I nodded, offering a soft grunt.
“Well, I gotta go man. See you.” He speaks a reply. The sound hitting my ears but my mind not bothering to comprehend it. I walk into my house, watching him walk away and laugh inside. I waste a few minutes doing absolutely nothing, until I hear a soft knock at the door. I get up, running a hand back through my hair. It’s too long to keep neat. Shrugging, I figure she won’t care anyway. She loves playing with it no matter how I style it. I pull open the door, and see her standing there, normal as this could seem. She’s dressed just as I see her at school, a black short skirt and tight tank top. My eyes skim her once, then meet her eyes, but I force them back down her, lingering daringly. I know she’s watching me look her over. She smiles, walking in without a welcome and pushes the door shut, ignoring my hand still on the knob. Then she comes to me, her arms on my back, one hand buried in my hair, her fingertips grazing over my neck. My hands find her hips, pulling her against me tightly. She presses up on me, her cheek brushing against mine. I breath a bit quicker, I always do when she hugs me like this. I can’t help it. Damn the female race. They always seem to know exactly where to touch, how to fit their body against yours, make your blood run hot…
“So how are you?” Her voice floats to me, whispered in my ear, her lips flickering over my skin. It’s almost as soft as her touch. Almost. Behind the innocent question and hug lay a rougher tone, a hard meaning, bare and brutal. You either accept it or reject it, but there’s no ignoring it. Some do, but they’re left blushing and stupid stuttering at the grace she carried herself with, and still possesses as she walks away. Then you’re left there, wondering if she even said anything at all, the hint left so obvious in the air that you can’t help but question if you imagined the whole thing. I groan involuntarily as she rubs against me, almost catlike and pulls back. I find my voice, my tongue ignoring my order at first, then spoke to her.
“Pretty good.” Our ritual is nearly over, and we both know what comes next. She pulls out her phone, pressing a few keys when I catch her hands. She raises an eyebrow, eyes shining and I almost loose my nerve. But I see his name, the screen of her phone lit up around the letters, her nail polish glittering as her finger sweeps over the ‘call’ button. I take the cell, hitting it off and lay it down on the table. She stands expectantly, knowing what I want, and also for me to move first. I take a few steps forward, testing how close I can get before I loose myself in her eyes. I push her backward, slowly, deliberately. She has a hunger in her eyes I’ve only seen one or two other times, and now it’s focused on me, and I almost understand why he is the way he is now, completely submissive to her, while her fingers run over my chest, tugging at my shirt. She sits on the couch, spreading her legs, her hands on my shoulders while I lay over her. Her knees sweep up my sides, smooth, my shirt already discarded to the floor. It’s like the whole world is falling with me, gravity tugging at me softly, or maybe it’s her, her hands still on my now bare shoulders. Time rights itself as I think this, and our mouths are suddenly together, hers open and willing. My tongue finds hers and sweeps across it, I’ve never kissed anyone before, but I know what to do instantly, feeling a familiar ache in me as her hands move down my sides. My hand is under her head, fingers buried in her hair. The other sliding up her shirt.
Her hips move into me, rubbing against me, and I groan, never having felt this before. I pull back from her lips, taking a breath and freeze as she moans my name. Something in me breaks, guilt and pleasure and anger and lust and running together in my blood that’s pumping steadily downward. I feel my tip push out of my pants, and I know I’m too horny to control myself anymore, and it’s clogged my mind so bad I don’t even care, I slide my hand down from under her shirt to her leg, moving up her skirt. She takes a quick breath as my fingers slide over her thong, and I feel like screaming and ripping her clothes off, pounding her senseless when I feel the wetness soaking through the cloth.
But I still have some control left, and she sees that. I can see her looking into me; feel her promise on the air. She wants to drive me crazy, and that scares me a little, but not as much as it makes me want her. I move her underwear out of the way, and put my fingers on her, feeling the pulse. Swallowing to ease the tightness of my throat, I freeze, I have no idea what I’m doing and hear the voice in the back of my mind screaming Idiout! Idiout! I feel my face flush, and start to panic but her hand finds mine, guiding my finger into her. I groan and she gasps, her eyes closing briefly. Then they return to mine, daring me to go farther. Feeling her, I play with the different ways to finger her, noting each gasp and moan torn from her throat.
After a few moments, I feel her getting tighter around my finger and she stops my hand, sitting up slightly. Her fingers are pulling at my pants, and I almost smile as she fumbles with them. I’ve never seen her awkward at anything, and seeing her having trouble with my button, no, zipper now was quite amusing. I blink and see her pull down my boxers, and fear chokes me, I don’t know if I want to keep going, but then her mouth is on me and I don’t know anything at all, my thoughts a jumbled mess of lust and want, her tongue tormenting me.
I groan, my hands finding her head, fingers gripping her hair tightly. Her tongue runs over my tip lightly, and I think I’m going to scream. This is the worst pleasure I’ve ever felt, torture and ecstasy all in one, mingling and eating at my mind. I’m dazed as her teeth scrape over my shaft softly, drawing another moan from me. Then she’s gone and I’m mumbling, pleading her incoherently to please, don’t stop. She’s staring at me, a slight smile playing on her lips, as if amused by my weakness for her. Then she’s pulling me downward again, silencing me with a soft hand on my length, Holding me against her.
She traces my tip over her clit, shuddering beneath me, her grip tightening. Her hand slides around my waist, pulling me a little closer, and I feel myself slide in her, her pussy wrapping around my dick tightly. I lower myself slowly, propped up on my elbows, feeling nothing but my heartbeat quickening in time with hers.
She moaned, her hands under my arms, palms flat on my back. I pull out a little, her muscles gripping my length, and push back in, my breath coming quicker. My feet are against the armrest, giving me leverage. Her eyes are half open, glazed over in lust. She tightens around me, and this brings me back to reality a bit. I smile and pause, feeling in control. She blinks, looking amused for a moment. Then her nails rake down my back, drawing a grunt from me, my head jerking backwards at the sudden pain. Growling almost, I look back down at her, just as her hands find my hips and pull me into her roughly. I grunt, and she wraps her legs around my waist, rolling her hips, grinding against me. I push my arm under her, holding her and thrust into her harder, grunting as I shove into her deeper.
She’s whimpering beneath me, and I know I’m about to come. I hold it, wanting her to first, so I lift her shirt and bra, lowering my lips to her nipple. I lick around it, teasing her. I really don’t know how to do it right, or make it feel good for her, but by the way she’s writhing beneath me, I think I’m doing alright. It’s hard to keep my lips to her chest while I’m panting so hard, but she tastes good, like sweat and something sweet I can’t exactly place and can’t think straight enough to care right now. She cries out, her back arching, nails clawing at my back again, this time in desperation. Her breasts press against my bare chest, and holding her neck, my fingers gripping her hair, I thrust into her one last time and come, my hips still moving slightly, her tight muscles milking me.
I pull out slowly, not wanting to hurt her and collapse on her, hoping my weight isn’t hurting her, but in the position we were, I don’t think she could have cared less. My pants had lowered to my ankles, and her shirt and bra had been torn off at some point, so most of our skin was bare. I enjoyed the softness of her, her legs around my waist, my arm under her, the other stroking her arm. We lay there for a while, sweating and panting. For a while, I didn’t ever want to get up. But then her hands were on my chest, her legs back against my sides, and she was pushing me up gently.
I sat back, letting her up. She stumbled to the bathroom. I watched her ass while she walked away, feeling like a sort of god in my own way. What would people say? Knowing I lost it to her. Would they be in awe? Congratulate me? Shake their head in pity and disgust? I really didn’t care. I know I fucked her out of anger, out of revenge to my so-called friend. Bastard. But after the sex, I know why he abandoned us for her. Sighing angrily, I sit up and fix my pants, then lay back down.
She comes back out from the bathroom, picking up her bra and shirt, and she’s dressed within a minute. She’s quick. I think, and shrug the thought off. Then she’s beside me, kneeling next to the couch, staring into my eyes. She’s always been able to read minds.
“You want to call him or should I?” She asks, as if answering my thoughts.
“Do you love him?” I reply, ignoring her question. She thinks a moment, before shaking her head slowly.
“No.” Her eyes scan mine, and I know she’s looking deeper then that, so I shut my mind to her and lean my head back, guilt now filling me. Her voice interrupts my self-pity. “You already did it, there’s no going back now.”
No. There never was a ‘going back.’ Damnit. I close my eyes a moment, Why’d you force this on us? Why didn’t you just stay away from her? My spite fills me. Her eyes look slightly worried. Does she even care? Feel bad? Does she realize she destroyed our friendship?
My name rolls off her lips again, and this time it sounds like poison. Her eyes burning through the back of my skull. She’s no longer glittering, just empty. All the mystery about her, everything that captured me before was gone. Before me knelt an empty, lost confused little girl. And I felt bad for her. But not enough to betray my friends. Her eyes harden, and I know she’d been in my thoughts.
A soft, almost sadistic smile comes to her face.
“But you already have.” Her words whip me cruelly, backlash stinging as I let realization seep into me. My eyes flicker to her, but she’s already gone, leaving me stunned. I sit up, looking around the room.
“Cassy?” My voice echoes in the empty house. She was just here, I pull open the curtains, but see no one in my front yard. Letting my hand drop, I look around the room again. Just a dream? Shaking my head, I stand and walk to the bathroom, turning on the sink and splashing water over my face. Standing and drying off on a hand towel I knew what I had to do. I walked to my front door. I held the knob, taking a breath. Pulling the door open, I walked out into the brightness, and saw him sitting on his porch, sipping the soda. I swallowed my pride and called him.
“Sam.”
No going back now.